Major Principles of Behaviorist and Neo-Behaviorist Theories

Introduction Theories of learning have been significantly shaped by two perspectives, behaviorism and neo-behaviorism. Both perspectives of learning theories were not developed as a consequence of research in any one academic field and these theories have influenced the conduct in many disciplines, for both researchers and practitioners. Present study is aimed at investigating both perspectives of learning theories, behaviorism and neo-behaviorism. With several sub-categories of behavioral and neo-behavioral theories of learning, only those theories will be discussed that cast a profound impact on discipline of learning. Disregarding the specific phases in behaviorism and neo-behaviorism, the paper will synthesize the literary findings of major theories. Two theories that are based on behaviorist perspective of learning i.e. classical conditioning and operant conditioning theory will be discussed along with one neo-behaviorist perspective theory. 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What You Need to Do About Essay Writing Topics for Bank Exams Starting in the Next 20 Minutes

What You Need to Do About Essay Writing Topics for Bank Exams Starting in the Next 20 Minutes Take a peek at all the topics are categorized in 5 sections so you can cover them conveniently. Some topics aren't simple to address and there isn't much information available about them, on the flip side, there's a plenty of material available on a number of the research essay topic but the issue is that they are rather common. Don't forget to take permission from your teacher after choosing the topic since if there is a problem she or he'd let you know about it. Have a little group discussion with friends and family on topics of your selection. The ideal way to keep updated with our most current posts is to like our page on Facebook. Keeping a schedule is crucial. Possessing relevant vocabulary for each topic will provide you a huge benefit. Top Choices of Essay Writing Topics for Bank Exams You have to be aware of what the essay is for and understand what your professor want to become from you. Reading a newspaper exposes an individual to a number of words. The introduction or the introductory paragraph is quite a relevant part of your essay on account of the simple fact it states the most important idea of your composition. So, the only means to increase your writing score is to increase your reading. Other individuals think that a woman's role needs to be limited to taking care of the home and kids. As time continues, the questions MBE practice sets start getting far more complex and hard. It's wise that you ask your teacher in the very first spot for any type of queries. In a feeling, you're taking raw unde rstanding of recently-learned topics and doing your very best to apply it as possible. Essay writing is a significant portion of the XAT Exam especially because it's conducted together with the most important exam. In English Language, compositions or essays actually are one of the most essential facets of the subject. Writing informative speech papers is typically a challenging job to several students. Hence, if you believe banking essays are boring just like your organization studies are, then you're probably wrong here. Writing haphazardly with no appropriate plan is likely to make the task more challenging for you. The Essay Topics list is provided for English in addition to Hindi section. In short for the very first topic you want to have some understanding of banking and economics. Essay Writing Topics for Bank Exams An essay could possibly be logically presented, it might have a number of ideas, but in the event the grammar is bad, it makes the whole essay not so g ood'. In the instance of writing essays also, you want to think in yourself. Writing an essay includes many measures. Writing custom essays won't be an issue anymore if you obey the easy steps below. To assist you prepare, here are a few sample essays. Banking essays can be real fun to play with if you've got an exhaustive understanding about the discipline and have keen interest in writing, so should you think that you cannot write decent banking essays than again you're erroneous. You may continue to keep your argumentative essays for your upcoming job portfolio in case they're highly graded. You can't expect to make an ideal essay in the very first attempt. Nobody can generate an ideal paper in the very first try only. Hence, if you prefer to balance your academic and family pressure side-by-side, you can just become totally free essay samples so you may have a simple idea of writing proper essays. You're able to get much better grade based on how well you compose the essay so to deliver a great and excellent essay, attempt to find methods to improve on it. New Step by Step Roadmap for Essay Writing Topics for Bank Exams This way you'd be in a position to compare your essays with that of others and assess your performance. Anyway, direct and indirect quotes are essential to support your understanding of academic writing style. When you have finished with your composition, it is quite important you take a minute and read over what you have written. Writing good compositions is crucial in the English Language in the feeling that it enables the student to have the a bility to express what is in her or his mind regarding a specific matter.

Romeo and Juliet starts with Romeo lovesick over a woman called Rosaline Essay Example For Students

Romeo and Juliet starts with Romeo lovesick over a woman called Rosaline Essay Romeo and Juliet starts with Romeo lovesick over a woman called Rosaline. Romeo is in love with her but she feels nothing for him, furthermore, she is to enter into a convent for women, which explains why he is so upset. Benvolio walks pass Romeo and sees him in distress and tries to make him forget about her. He says to Romeo near the end of Act 1 Scene, line 217, By giving liberty unto thine eyes, examine other beauties. He is basically saying that Romeo needs to look at other women to forget Rosaline. At that moment, a servant walks pass and asks Benvolio to read out a notice to fulfil the servants curiosity. The note states that there will be a party at the Capulets, which is fancy dress. The Montagues then decide to invite themselves in the hope that Romeo will find and fall in love with another woman. At the party, Tybalt sees them, who becomes furious by their intrusion and tells his uncle, Capulet. Capulet tells Tybalt to ignore him, or the quote reads on line 70 of Act 1 Scene 5, take no note of him. Tybalt defies this and says that he is dishonouring the family name, but Capulet double-insults Tybalt and tells him to leave his sight. This makes Tybalt even more furious and in a sense sets the ball rolling for his revenge on Romeo. Shakespeare was a playwright and a genius in his own right. He wrote many plays and they all had the same thing in common; they became very popular and had little stage directions. He didnt put any stage directions, because he was the director and he knew how he wanted the play to be acted. By not putting in any stage directions he enable two thinks. He allowed other directors to direct the play how they want, as well as giving the director and infinite amount of freedom, so the actors could make up their own motivation to have the greatest effect on the audience. This freedom the director got made him able to put his own twists into the appearance, accent and body language of the actors which resulted in, for example, in the Baz Lurman production, the Montagues wore Hawaiian shirts and Tybalt was killed by a gun that had a picture of Mary on the handle. These are just two examples on how the director can interpret Shakespeare actions with little stage directions Because the actors get very little directions on how to act, they can use body language and their hands to symbolise anger, frustration, confusion, happiness and sadness, this makes the play a lot more understandable for the viewer/audience. Another advantage is that everyone (director and actor) is that they can express themselves so the audience will understand the story line. For example, at the beginning of Act 3 Scene 1, line 1-30, when Benvolio and Mercutio are arguing, they go through several emotions and expressions, which are all, used to emphasise their point and reactions. The Characters The name Mercutio is taken from the word Mercury, which in Ancient Greek civilisation was the name of the messenger for the gods, and the name Benvolio means good will. Shakespeare could have purposely used these names to reflect their personality. There are four main characters that Act 3 Scene 1 revolves around; they are Mercutio, Benvolio and Romeo, who are all Montagues and Tybalt who is a Capulet. Benvolio is a kind and sensible young man. He is depicted in a bitter part of the scene as a non-violent and caring person. However, this is the total opposite of what Mercutio was accusing him of, in lines 1-29. In this sections Mercutio says things like. Thou wilt quarrel with a man that hath more a hair or a hair less in his beard than thou hast. Mercutio is saying here that Benvolio is a fighter and will start trouble for any trivial reason. However, this quote, were not sure whether Mercutio is being serious, ironic or sarcastic. The facial expressions of Benvolio are not exploited. In other words we do not get the impression that he is smiling or staring etc. this sense of ambiguity lets the reader of the play understand him differently. This is also the case with his body language; he will say something, but he could say it a number of ways so it reaches the other characters and the audience in different ways. For instance, he could say something quick as a come back to shock the other, or slowly, as if passing judgement, comparing or as if in disgrace. The motivation Benvolio has is to be the group leader and to take responsibilities for their actions. I feel that Benvolio likes to avoid conflicts this will reflect in his body language i.e. not to stand threatening. I want the audience to see Benvolio as more or less the leader. To do this, I will make him look big, by standing closer to the audience. I want Benvolio to look intellectual and mature, I will do this by making him speak clearly, wear good clothes and have a good posture. Benvolio and Mercutio have a love-hate relationship, which is emphasised throughout the play. Mercutio is the loudest one. He comes across as a street fighter, hot headed, a show off and as over confidant. Because of his flamboyancy, he does many plays on words (puns). We feel that his facial expressions and body language to show and express these qualities and does many things to get a reaction, either from his friends or the audience. For example, lines 5-6, he says, when he enters the confines of a tavern the relevance this has is that it is said when he is in a group and the he is that he could be talking about someone else and expecting a reaction. For example, he could be nodding or tilting his head towards Benvolio when he says it, but keeping eye contact with the others as if waiting for them to agree. Speech wise, Mercutio uses puns a lot; a pun is a play on words that are alike in sound but mean different things. For example, line 29, Mercutio says, the fee-simple? O simple! The effect that puns have on the audience is that they are likely to laugh and add to the mood of the scene. His motivation throughout the scene, especially during the confrontation is to not show fear and to stir up the mad blood stirring. Mercutio acts as though he is competing for the limelight and attention with the others especially Tybalt. I will tell Mercutio to keep moving and try not to stay still. The effect this will have on the audience is that Mercutio will seem to be frantic, joking and maybe furious. This will make the audience wonder if its all a front or his way of showing fear or even to intimidate Tybalt. I want to audience to love Mercutio because I feel he will bring a lot of comic relief for the time that he is in the play. Furthermore, it will mean a great loss when he dies and the romantic-tragedy theme of the play will slowly becoming true Romeo enters the act half way through the confrontation between Mercutio and Tybalt. He has just come back from marrying Juliet so he would be in a happy mood. From the beginning of the play, Romeo comes across as a humorous and caring character, but this is covered up because he is hiding a secret. I feel that Romeo is a fighter but only when needs call. Romeo will not make eye contact with Tybalt because that would symbolise him wanting to fight. This is all part of social and historical context; avoiding eye contact will show humbleness and fear and make Tybalt not want to fight. The way that Romeo talks makes the reader and viewer think that he is quiet and not meaning to be threatening. This relays on the audience because they think that he is a coward; an example of social and historical context. Being called a coward is an insult because it shows that the person is afraid. I want the audience to feel mixed emotions for Romeo, because I feel that there is a certain ambiguity of what he feels, i.e. frustration because he cant fight/ kill Tybalt. Confusion as he is not sure why Tybalt wants to fight. Romeos relationship with the other characters is love-love. They respect him because he respects them and they are all good friends who would and have fought for Romeo. Benvolio and Romeo are cousins. In Act 1 Scene 1 line 51, Benvolio says, Good morrow, Cousin. This shows that they have more than a friendship relationship. Because Romeo is forced to love Tybalt, as he is now his cousin and no one else knows it, dramatic irony is used to make us pity him. Dramatic irony is a poetic device that can be used to create tension and drama amongst other things. It is when the audience knows the truth about something that the characters dont. In Act 1, scene 1, Romeo talks about his love for a woman. During this time, he talks in rhyming couplets e.g. for beauty starved with her severity, cuts beauty off from all posterity. It strikes me as him being very true and sincere, because he is complementing her on many aspects, but focusing on her beauty (lines 210,211,206,207 etc) Tybalt is the cousin of Romeo, but he doesnt yet know it. The impression I got of Tybalt is that he is all a front, in other words he gives the impression of a very arduous and harsh person and then says something that symbolises he is afraid, such as in Act 3 Scene 1, line 32, follow me close, for I will speak to them he says to his followers. This shows that he needs other people so he looks intimidating. Through both of the productions of Romeo and Juliet, Tybalt is portrayed as a stiff, focused and very confrontational. I think that the directors got this impression because he does everything in numbers i.e. to confront people. Tybalt always looks mad, serious and strong. I would like those qualities to come across because it would reflect that he was annoyed with Romeo and his friends. Prologue why does the play keep its audience enthralled to the end? EssayIt is very important that Mercutio shouts out, nearly crying the line: A plague aboth your house. In Elizabethan society, many people were superstitious and that line, which is putting a curse on both of their families. The last words from a dying person are considered to be worth the same as a prophecy. The actual fight will be short, because I feel that a long fight will not convey a fierce and brutal theme. I want Mercutio to die on stage, but very near to the audience, the reason for this is for two reasons. 1) I dont want there to be any ambiguity over his death; I want everyone to know that good Mercutio has died. 2) It will change the atmosphere in the play and make everyone dislike Tybalt and therefore rejoice when he is killed and feel sorry for Romeo when he is expelled. The audience and the characters will know that Mercutio has died because his page will look up at Romeo crying and shaking his head from left to right. Throughout the confrontation a sense of dramatic irony is created. Dramatic irony creates tension because the audiences are waiting for something to happen and for the character to understand and react. Furthermore dramatic irony adds to the drama of the play, in a sense that the audience is involved in the play and they say among themselves things like, No! Dont go there! or Dont say that. Dramatic irony is used excessively in line 45, when I make Romeo turn away and walk from Tybalt. The audience knew why he is walking but no one else does, I will represent them not knowing by everyone looking around. The Fight The fight between Romeo and Tybalt is an important one. It sends emotions running and the understanding of characters of the trail. Because Tybalt killed Mercutio and Romeo accepts all the blame, I want him to fight for revenge and emotional distress. I will make Romeo block out the fact hat they are cousins; it will play no significance in Romeos actions. Taking all of this account, therefore I want the fight to be quick, brutal and one sided. I want the fight to be quick because it will show skill and cancel out any feelings that Romeo is a coward. I would stage the fight to be brutal, because t would represent Romeos anger at the death of his friend. This is also his motivation; to express how he feels about his friend dying, under Romeos arm. Having the fight one sided, shows how merciless Romeo acts; this is how I interpret how Shakespeare wrote. Romeo says in line 120 either thou, or I, or both must go with him referring to Mercutio, and meeting him in heaven. Romeo is saying here that they will fight to the death, again this shows his frustration. I want Romeo to say this line slowly and deeply. And pausing between each personal noun. Romeo will be strong and not making any sort of movement. In Act 2 Scene 4, line 15-31, Mercutio jokes about Tybalts style of fighting, on line 19, he says, he fights as you sing prick-songs, keeps time, distance, he rests at minimum rests. Mercutio is making an elaborate comparison between music and Tybalt fighting; both played strictly by the rules. Mercutio mocks Tybalt fighting to show two things. Firstly, to represent how little Mercutio likes Tybalt and secondly to show Benvolio of his knowledge of sword fighting. This scene contradicts Tybalt for the way that he killed Mercutio; as he thrusted in, not using the stocatta stance. The way Mercutio fights suggests that he is lethal and will, more or less, do anything to win, on the other hand Mercutio could be mocking Tybalt in a way that he is being sarcastic and saying Tybalt fighting style is that of an amateur. He says that the new fighter (Tybalt) has very stiff posture, or as he said on line 28, these fashion mongers, these pardon mes, who stand so much on the new form, that the cannot sit at ease at the old bench he is basically saying that the way that their posture makes it very uncomfortable to sit and do anything. He disagrees with them a lot. The way that Tybalt fights suggests that he is distinguished and elaborate, much like Mercutio. Showing that he can get the job done with style and finesse; just like footballers, they can easily score a goal, but they will put a curl on the ball and dummy it to show off. This is how I interpret Tybalt fighting, but not how I will show it in the play. Mercutio makes a joke about being a grave man; by turning it into a pun. A pun is a play on words that involve to words that are spelt the same but mean different things. The word grave as in death or someone dead as well in the sense of serious danger. I would try and make Mercutio try and laugh at himself, as though mocking his wound and not showing any fear, because that will make him look weak and guarantee Tybalt won. Just like keeping eye contact with a dog, because if it fears you it will not attack, but if you fear it, then it will attack. As Mercutio is dying, he says A plague aboth your house several times. It is basically a curse that wishes bad lick on both the Montagues and Capulets. This is a great example of Social and Historical context. The first time that this is said, is on line 82, Mercutio will say it slowly, as he will be feeling pain, but with a lot of energy. The next time that it is said (line 91) will be said shouting and fairly fast, whilst pointing at Romeo, as if 100% blaming Romeo for making him loose a battle. The last time its said is on line 97, it will be said in a remorseful way, as though he has to say it. The way that I will make Romeo act to him killing Tybalt, will be to go through a rush of many emotion. After Tybalt is killed, he will stare at the body, with and expression of anger, but a very slight smile. Romeo will then have a look of disgust, breathing heavily and fast, to represent the adrenaline rush. I would then tell him to totally change his look, he will turn away from the body and look at the floor, and take deeper breaths. I would then tell him to run his hands through his hair, to represent him thinking. This is when he realises the impact that it will have on Juliet, because he will be killed for he has murdered, or as the prince referred to it Once more, on pain of death, all men depart. When the Prince finds that Romeo killed Tybalt, he said on line 187 immediately, we do exile him hence. To show this rush of emotions and the realisation of what he has done ahs effected Juliet, I would tell Romeo to shout line 127; O, I am fortunes fool. Saying that he is a fool fo r doing what fortune wanted him to do i.e. kill Tybalt. In the Zeferelli version of the play, Romeo has the upper hand two-thirds of the way, and in the Baz Lurman version, Romeo has the upper hand all the way. I think the reason for these different interpretations all come down to Social and Historical context. I.e. in the 16th Century every child was taught how to fight and he wanted to show that the system worked. But Lurman portrayed that if someone lost a fight then its because the other person had the killer instinct. Another reason for Romeos brutality is because he doesnt mind of he dies, but he wants revenge or as he put it on line 120, Either thou or I, or both must go. Furthermore, he said, And fire-eyed fury be my conduct now! . Conclusion Act 3 Scene 1 is one of the most important scenes in the entire play, primarily because it loses two characters. The effect that these two characters have is really how the audience feels towards the rest of the characters. For example, is Romeo a villain or a friend and is Benvolio a coward, fighter or troublemaker? The audience will interpret these possibilities by the way that I make theme come across; with the use of facial and body expressions and poetic devices such as dramatic irony. This scene the climax of the other chain of events, which lead to the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet. Shakespeare most probably killed off Mercutio early in the play, to create a seldom atmosphere among the characters and the audience. A seldom atmosphere usually means that more tragedy is coming, and it is really just getting the audience into the plot. Since the theme of the play is Romantic Tragedy, the majority of the play will play among these line, except for the end or the play where there is a total contrast of a reconciliation between the Montagues and the Capulets; the emphasis of the new-found friendship, to the highest degree. Mercutio dying sets the ball rolling for other tragedies, that the audience may come across. At the end of scene 1, I want the audience to be overcome with emotions and reactions. I will make the actors emphasise their facial and body language to such an extent that the audience feels sorry/ happy for the characters. I will try and make the audience ponder the question: who is the enemy? Mercutio, for starting trouble? Tybalt, for killing first? or Romeo, for revenging the death? I will try and achieve this by making the characters have menacing looks and malicious actions or way of speaking, but also give them tender tendencies. The audience will draw their own conclusions The audience will also try and predict how Romeo and Juliets marriage will decrease or improve. They will try and use evidence, on where their marriage will get better or worse by, for example, after Romeo killed Tybalt, he may have a less distressed look; this symbolises he is not that worried about Juliet, therefore he will make everything okay in the end.

Mammals Essays (1444 words) - Animal Physiology, Therapsids

Mammals Mammals have existed for the past 200 million years. According to fossil evidence, they evolved from a mammal like reptile group. These reptile ancestors were small, active carnivores. They were equipped with several specialized types of teeth. Their limbs were positioned more directly under the trunk as opposed to spreading out to the sides. Both of these characteristics are prominent features of mammals. For the past 70 million years mammals have been the dominant animals in terrestrial ecosystems. Because they are warm-blooded, they have an advantage over their reptilian ancestors. Despite their size differences, the great blue whale and the pygmy shrew have something in common: they are both members of a warm-blooded, air-breathing class of vertebrate animals known as Mammalia, or mammals. In many ways mammals are the most highly developed of all creatures. The term mammal explains one important way in which creatures in this class are set apart from other animals. It comes from the Latin mamma, which means, breast. Every female mammal has special glands, mammae that secrete milk. The females of all but the most primitive mammalian species are viviparous. This means they bear their young alive. The young are then fed with milk until they have grown enough to get food for themselves. Hair is a typical mammalian feature. In many whales, however, it exists only in the fetal stages of development. Another basic trait of mammals is their highly developed brains--the most complex known. Particularly well developed is their cerebrum, the part of the brain that controls memory and learning. The mammalian brain enables the young to learn from the experience of their elders. Since the young mammal is dependent on its mother for nourishment, a period of learning is possible. This in turn has brought about a degree of behavioral adaptability unknown in any other group of organisms. Whales, seals, and dogs are among the most intelligent mammals, but monkeys, apes, and humans are the most intelligent of all. Warm-bloodedness makes them capable of longer terms of sustained activity than cold-blooded organisms can undertake. This allows them to exploit environments that would be inhospitable to cold-blooded animals. The term warm-blooded does not mean that a mammal's body temperature is consistently warmer than that of the environment. In the hot tropics, in fact, the opposite is true. Warm-blooded animals, or endotherms, have an inner climate-control system that is physiologically maintained. Mammals can sustain a constant body temperature that is ideal for their bodily functions under most weather conditions. This requires a high rate of metabolism, and many attributes of mammals are related to its maintenance. A high metabolic rate requires a great deal of fuel in the form of food and oxygen. By being highly active and having strong limbs, mammals are able to generate heat and obtain large amounts of food. Their respiratory, circulatory, and digestive systems also need to be highly efficient to transform fuel into heat energy. For example, mammals have a secondary palate, which permits breathing while chewing or sucking. This feature assists in the delivery of large amounts of oxygen to the body tissues, where it is used to metabolize food. Food must be mixed with oxygen, or oxidized, for conversion into energy. Unlike cold-blooded creatures, whose body temperatures are dependent on the weather, mammals must produce a lot of energy to heat themselves. Accordingly, they need large quantities of oxygen. Mammals have strong lungs and, unlike any other class of animals, they have a breathing muscle called the diaphragm to pump large amounts of air into the body and force out carbon dioxide wastes. The circulatory system of mammals is also very efficient. Their red blood cells can transport more oxygen than those of any other animals, except birds. The mammalian heart is a complex four-chambered organ designed to keep unoxygenated blood and oxygenated blood from mixing. To accommodate this blood separation, mammals have a dual circulatory system. Mammals have a number of traits designed to conserve heat energy. Most mammals have body hair, which insulates by trapping air. Instead of a hairy coat, water-dwelling mammals such as dolphins and whales have a thick, insulating layer of fat.. Hair also serves a defensive and tactile role in mammals. The hair of hedgehogs

Exactly What to Expect From AP Language Multiple Choice

Exactly What to Expect From AP Language Multiple Choice SAT / ACT Prep Online Guides and Tips Perhaps because the free-response section of the AP Language and Composition exam is worth more than the multiple-choice section, some teachers spend much more time preparing you for free-response than multiple-choice. While it's great to be prepared for the essays, this might leave you feeling like a lost and confused lamb when it comes to the AP English Language and Composition multiple choice section. But never fear, the guide is here! This guide will give a brief overview of the AP Language and Composition multiple-choice section, the eight question types you can expect to see on the test, three preparation strategies, a slate of AP practice question resources, and finally some tips for success on test day. The Multiple-Choice Section: An Overview Section I of the AP English Language and Composition test is the multiple-choice section. This section will have 52-55 questions testing you on how well you can read and understand nonfiction passages for their use of rhetoric. On the exam, you will be presented with four to five nonfiction passages. You will receive a bit of orienting information at the beginning of this passage, for example "this essay originally appeared in a major national newspaper in the 1980s." Each passage will have about 10-15 questions associated with it. The AP Lang multiple choice section is worth 45% of your total exam score. You will receive one point to your raw score for every question you answer correctly. However, as on other AP exams, your raw score will be converted to a scaled score from 1-5. But what's actually on the multiple-choice section? The next section explores what kinds of questions you can expect to actually be asked on the exam. The 8 Types of Multiple-Choice Questions There are eight kinds of multiple choice questions on the AP Language exam. In this section, I'll go over each type, provide an example question, and walk you through answering it. All of the example questions come from the "Course and Exam Description." You can find the original passages these questions are referring to there as well. Type 1: Reading Comprehension As you might expect, reading comprehension questions are about testing if you understood the passage on a concrete level: what does this particular sentence mean in a literal sense? And so on. You can usually identify them from phrases like "according to" and "refers." To succeed on these kinds of questions, your best strategy is to go back and re-read the part of the passage the question is asking about. Do so carefully, and when you then answer the question, focus on what the passage is actually saying outright. Don't infer on reading comprehension questions! Example: Let's go back and look at Lines 23-26 to answer this question: "But ‘books are not about schedules,' author Stephanie Nolen argues; rather, they are ‘about submerging yourself...about getting consumed.'" To return to the question, what is her "primary criticism of book clubs," then? Well, she says, "books are not about schedules." So, they shouldn't have to be a scheduled-in obligation. The only answer that choice that resembles what she actually says in the passage is that the problem with books clubs is that they (A), "are too programmed." Type 2: Implication This question style moves beyond basic, concrete reading comprehension into the realm of implication. Implication is what the author seems to say without actually coming out and saying it directly. However, even though the answer may not be written out clearly in the passage, the question will still have a clear correct answer based on textual evidence. You can identify implication questions from phrases like "best supported," "implies," "suggests," and "inferred." As for reading comprehension questions (and indeed, all multiple-choice questions on the AP) turn and look back at the relevant part of the passage before you answer. Then ask yourself: Which interpretation put forth by the answer choices does the passage *most* support? Example: First, we need to find where in the passage names for hurricanes and tornadoes are discussed. We can find this in lines 14-17: "A tornado, although more violent than a much longer lasting hurricane, has a life measured in minutes, and weathercasters watch it snuff out as it was born: unnamed." What answers about why tornadoes are unnamed and hurricanes are named are at all supported by this line? Choice (A), "there are too many of them," is clearly incorrect as the line says nothing about the frequency of either weather event. Choice (B) says, "their destruction is not as great as that of hurricanes." This is a trap! You may know based on your own knowledge that hurricanes generally incur much greater damages overall than tornadoes, but the passage doesn't say that. You have to choose an implication that is actually supported by the passage, and the passage doesn't say which causes more destruction. Choice (C) says "they last too short of a time." The passage does say that hurricanes are "much longer lasting" and that the life of a tornado is "measured in minutes." This could be a reasonable answer, but let's make sure it's the best one before we select it. Choice (D) says "they move too erratically to be plotted" and Choice (E) says tornadoes "can appear in any area of the world." It doesn't matter if either of those statements is true since the question asks what the passage implies, and the passage does not discuss either their movements or where they appear. Thus, (C) is the answer most supported by the passage. It's a trap! Don't be fooled. Type 3: Overall Passage and Author Questions Overall passage and author questions want you to identify key, overarching elements of the passage or author's views, like the purpose of the text, the author's audience, the author's attitude toward the subject, and so on. These questions are identifiable because they won't refer back to a specific place in the text but will instead ask general questions that apply to the entire excerpt. These questions can be a little more difficult to answer than those where you can look to a specific place in the text to answer your questions. You'll really need to have an overall impression of the passage based on its overarching details. It might be helpful to jot down a couple overall impressions of the excerpt right after you read it, to refer back to when faced with overall passage questions. Example: This passage is about the rise of book clubs. The first paragraph gives examples to demonstrate that book clubs have become a popular phenomenon. The second discusses book club backlash and some book club guides. The third paragraph asserts that book clubs are positive and sharing literary experiences is a good thing. Which of the answers fits with the passage? Answer (A) can be eliminated right away because there is no personal narrative. Answer (B) can also be eliminated because the passage begins with an example about Oprah, not any "empirical" (numbers-based) data. Answer (C) can be eliminated because the passage never introduces any questions related to the practice of book clubs. Choice (D) could be good- the first two paragraphs give mostly description, and the third and final paragraph gives an evaluation. Choice (E) doesn't fit because there is no initial condemnation of "the practice" (i.e. of book clubs). So (D) is the correct answer. Type 4: Relationships Between Parts of the Text Another question type will require you to identify or describe a relationship between two specific parts of the text. This could be paragraphs or shorter line segments, or a specific part of the passage compared to the rest of the passage or the passage as a whole. My advice for answering these questions is similar to my advice for most questions- go back and read the parts of the passage in question! You may want to jot down an overarching impression of what each part of the text is accomplishing or saying as you do, which should help you compare them and identify the relationship. Example: Because this passage is only two paragraphs long, this question is essentially asking us about the relationship between the first and second halves of the passage. What is the main idea of each of the sections? Well, the first paragraph describes essentially what makes a strong writer. The second paragraph establishes that Carlyle is "such a writer" and then discusses some of his works and why they are important. When we look at the answer choices, what matches up best with our main idea descriptions? Clearly (A), which describes how the first paragraph describes the strengths of a writer (which we know Carlyle has based on the topic sentence of the second paragraph), and the second describes Carlyle's "legacy." What kind of relationship do the parts of the text have? Type 5: Interpretation of Imagery/Figurative Language This type of question is concerned with the underlying meaning or implication of imagery or figurative language used in the excerpt. What is the author trying to accomplish with this particular phrase or this metaphor? Again, it is critical that you go back and read the part of the passage that the question refers to, or you will be completely lost on these questions (more so than on most others). You may want to re-read a few lines before and after as well so you can get a sense of the imagery in context. Example: For this to make sense, we need the entire sentence the "acorns" appear in: "It is an idle question to ask if his books will be read a century hence: if they were all burnt as the grandest of Suttees on his funeral pile, it would only be like cutting down an oak after its acorns have sown a forest." What could this mean? Well, acorns come from oak trees and make more oak trees. So this must refer to something that comes from Carlyle and is somehow a replication of him or his works. The best choices if we think about that, then, would be (A) his children, or (C) the ideas in his books. However, since the passage doesn't mention anything about his children that would be an irrelevant detail and can't be what the acorns represent. So the answer must be (C). Type 6: Purpose of Part of the Text These questions will ask you to choose the answer that best states the purpose that a given part of the text serves in the piece. What is the author hoping to accomplish with this specific example/sentence/device? These questions can usually be identified because they will ask specifically about purpose or function of a specific moment. To address these questions, you will need to, of course, re-read the part of the text in question. Think about what point the author is trying to make in that specific moment, and how that would serve their larger argument. All parts of a given text will serve the larger argument if they are well-constructed, so if it seems like an interpretation of the text presented in the answer choices doesn't work with the main argument, eliminate it. Example: These lines read, "You may meet a man whose wisdom seems unimpeachable, since you find him entirely in agreement with yourself; but this oracular man of unexceptionable opinions has a green eye, a wiry hands, and altogether, a Wesen, or demeanor, that makes the world look blank to you, and whose unexceptionable opinions become a bore; while another man who deals in what you cannot but think ‘dangerous paradoxes,' warms your heart by the pressure of his hand, and looks out on the world with so clear and loving an eye, that nature seems to reflect the light of his glance upon your own feeling." This sentence is really overwhelming, so let's try to break it down and re-write it in a simpler way. "You might meet a man who seems wise because he agrees with you, but this man might eventually become a bore; while a different man who presents challenging ideas may warm your heart and eventually convince you." This fits into the larger argument because Carlyle is the writer who presents challenging ideas, and this piece is in praise of Carlyle and his legacy. Let's go through the answers and see which choice fits best. Choice (A) describes a contrast between a writer who reinforces reader viewpoints and one who challenges them. This sounds like it could be right- let's keep it. Choice (B) describes an analogy between kinds of people and types of writing they prefer. There's no analogy in these lines, so we can eliminate (B). Choice (C) says that these lines challenge the idea that writers modify their ideas to appeal to readers. But since this passage overall refers to Carlyle's legacy and doesn't give any indication that he modifies his views to appeal to readers, so we can eliminate it. Choice (D) doesn't even refer to writers, and Choice (E) doesn't work because the lines say nothing about good and evil. So (A) is the best answer choice. Good and evil? Aren't all these questions evil? Type 7: Rhetorical Strategy For these questions, you'll need to identify the specific rhetorical strategy used by the author in the specific place in the passage. Essentially, you'll be identifying the particular argumentative "move" that the author is deploying to try to convince the audience of their position. Example: The passage identified in the question says: "The character of his influence is best seen in the fact that many of the men who have the least agreement with his opinions are those to whom the reading of Sartor Resartus was an epoch in the history of their minds. The extent of his influence may be best seen in the fact that ideas which were startling novelties when he first wrote them are now become common-places. And we think few men will be found to say that this influence on the whole has not been for good. There are plenty who question the justice of Carlyle's estimates of past men and past times, plenty who quarrel with the exaggerations of the Latter-Day Pamphlets, and who are as far as possible from looking for an amendment of things from a Carlylian theocracy with the ‘greatest man', as a Joshua who is to smite the wicked (and the stupid) till the going down of the sun. But for any large nature, those points of difference are quite incidental. It is not a theorist, but a s a great and beautiful human nature, that Carlyle influences us." So which of the rhetorical strategies in the answer choices makes the most sense? Choice (A) says the author berates Carlyle's opponents. This doesn't seem accurate- while she mentions those who disagree with him, she doesn't berate or insult them. Choice (B) says she acknowledges but discredits other arguments. While, again, she acknowledges that there are those who disagree with Carlyle, she doesn't really mention their specific arguments or discredit them. Choice (C) suggests she claims most people don't recognize Carlyle's genius. This can't be right; she says "few men will be found to say that this influence on the whole has not been for good" and describes how many of his ideas are now "commonplace." Choice (D) says she cites facts. She doesn't- she gives examples of his works and describes reactions. Thus, choice (E), which says she gives examples that reflect his influence, is correct. This is the best choice as the passage repeatedly emphasizes that even those who don't agree with him are affected by his thoughts. Type 8: Style and Effect The last question type asks you about stylistic moments in the text and the effect created by those stylistic choices. Essentially, what does the author accomplish by making that particular stylistic choice? To address these questions, re-read the sentence or moment in question with an eye for how it sounds and feels. Don't just think about what it says- what does it evoke? Example: The sentence says, "‘Oh God, that I were a writer!' She cried. ‘Surely a writer could not string words together about Henry Irving's Hamlet and say nothing, nothing.'" The stylistic choice in question is the italicization of "nothing, nothing." We may notice that this mirrors the italicization of "writer." Italics generally indicate emphasis- so what's the effect of emphasizing "writer" and "nothing, nothing"? Be careful here, because it might be tempting to choose (B) - indicate a sarcastic tone. This kind of emphasis is often used to communicate sarcasm. However, that doesn't fit with the rest of the passage, or the fact that she "dropped her pen in despair" just before. The best choice is (A), that it emphasizes her frustration. With the eight question types addressed, we can move on to more general strategies to prepare to take the multiple choice section of AP Language and Composition. You are the general of your own AP preparation army! How to Prepare There are several key strategies you can use to prepare yourself to rock the multiple-choice section of the AP Language and Composition exam. #1: Read and Engage With Nonfiction A key prep strategy is to read nonfiction of all different types, particularly nonfiction that argues a position or advances an agenda of some kind. When you read, you should work on identifying and understanding how the author makes use of rhetorical strategies and techniques. Ask yourself: What is the author's argument? What evidence do they use to support their position? What is the nature of their evidence- anecdotes, statistics, illustrative examples? What rhetorical techniques and strategies do they use to build their argument? Are they making particular kinds of appeals? Is their argument strong? If yes, what makes it strong? If no, what makes it weak? Constantly considering these questions as you read will help you learn to analyze passages quickly and informally, which is an essential skill for answering multiple-choice questions focused on rhetorical analysis. #2: Learn Rhetorical Terms and Strategies In order to analyze works, of course, you need to know rhetorical terms and strategies. You will undoubtedly learn many techniques and strategies from your teacher, and you should definitely review those before the exam. You can also check out my essential list of 55 AP English Language terms you need to know. Make sure you aren't just memorizing the terms and the definitions, but that you can actually identify all of the techniques at work in the things you read! #3: Practice Answering Multiple-Choice Questions To succeed on the multiple-choice section, you need to practice answering multiple-choice questions! This will help you get familiar with the feel of the multiple-choice section and identify any gaps in your understanding. The next section will suggest tons of sources for practice multiple-choice questions. A whole pile of practice questions! Practice Question Resources There are a variety of practice test resources you can use to hone your multiple choice skills. The best multiple-choice practice resources come from the College Board. This is because they write the AP exam, so their practice questions are the most like real AP multiple-choice questions. Unfortunately, there are not as many official resources for the AP Language and Composition exam as there are for some other tests. However, once you run out of official College Board practice questions, there are still some unofficial resources that you can use for multiple choice practice. In this section I'll go over both. Official Multiple-Choice Resources The College Board offers both complete released exams and sample multiple-choice questions. Complete Released Exams Complete official exams are a great resource if you can find them, because they will have complete multiple-choice sections for you to practice with. Unfortunately, the College Board has not released any official previous exams for AP Language and Composition, as they have for many other tests. You may, though, still be able to find complete official exams from past years by Googling "AP Language complete released exam" or similar variations on that. You might also ask your AP teacher if there are copies of old AP exams you can use for practice. They often have access to past exams and may be able to loan them to you. Sample Questions From the "AP Course and Exam Description" The AP Course and Exam description for AP Language and Composition includes 50 sample multiple-choice questions. This is actually only two questions short of a complete multiple choice section, so this a pretty sizable collection of questions to add to your practice bank. Better get a safe so you can put it in the bank! Unofficial Multiple-Choice Practice Resources There are tons of sites out there offering free multiple-choice practice questions and quizzes for the AP Language and Composition exam. But they aren't all created equal! In this section I'll highlight just several of these resources that are most worth your time. For an even more comprehensive list, see my list of all practice tests available for AP Lang and Comp. College Countdown Complete AP Language Practice Test This site has a complete unofficial practice test. You can ignore the essays for the purposes of multiple choice practice. The wording of questions on the multiple-choice section aren't exactly the same as on a real AP exam, but the tasks are very similar and the passages are well-selected. This is a great source for sample multiple choice questions once you run out of College Board official options. McGraw-Hill AP Practice Quiz McGraw-Hill, an academic book publisher, offers this free 25-question multiple-choice "diagnostic quiz." It has difficult, well-written multiple-choice questions that really look and feel like real AP questions. The passages do open in another window, which is slightly awkward and annoying, but the questions are so good that it's worth it! The quiz is supposed to be 25 questions, but you could theoretically get more than 25 questions from this resource since every time you open a new test window you get a subset randomly selected questions from a question pool. Albert English Language Practice Albert has a decent number of small multiple-choice quizzes that offer practice questions analyzing the rhetoric of various notable nonfiction passages. The style of the questions is a little more informal and to the point than genuine AP questions published by the College Board, but they are still good practice for answering multiple-choice questions about rhetorical techniques deployed in a passage. So when you've exhausted your other resources this is still a solid multiple-choice practice question source. In order to answer questions, you need to sign up for a free account. It then costs "credits" to answer questions. You can both buy additional credits and earn credits for answering questions correctly, so if you are good at answering questions, you can use this service for free pretty much indefinitely! Otherwise I don't really advise buying credits since there are frankly better paid resources available (like review books). Review Books Most review books also have practice multiple-choice questions designed to mimic College Board questions and are a good resource when you've used all of your official and unofficial free questions. However, not all review books are of equal quality, and some have questions that are downright poor quality. Be sure to look at reviews and flip through the book to check out its questions and how they compare to College Board questions before buying if you can. As a starting place, Barron's and the Princeton Review are usually reliable review book sources. You might need a nap after you do all of these questions. Test Day Tips Here are four key strategies to help you succeed on the multiple choice section on test day. Interact With the Text When you are initially reading a passage, do some preliminary marking up! Underline things that seem particularly significant, like a thesis statement or major shift in the text. Make notes of motifs or confusing sentences. These marks will help you familiarize yourself with the text and navigate it when you come back to answer the questions. Identify Main Ideas Once you finish reading a passage through, quickly jot down the main idea/argument of the piece, the author's purpose, and the intended audience. This will help you answer overarching passage questions. Additionally, preemptively identifying these points before addressing the questions should help make many of them more clear and help you keep the passage framed in your mind as you work through questions. Always Re-read Never rely on your memory when the question is about a specific place in the text: always go back and read the line in question. If the answer still isn't clear once you've consulted the text, read a little bit around the specified line for more context and clarity. Eliminate Off-Topic Answers An easy trick to eliminating wrong answers for many questions is to simply identify answer choices that are clearly off-topic. At a first pass these might not be obvious, since they may use a word or phrase from the passage and will sound stylistically similar to the other choices. But a closer look will reveal that the answer has nothing to do with the paragraph or passage topic! Here's an example: The sentence says, "‘Oh God, that I were a writer!' She cried. ‘Surely a writer could not string words together about Henry Irving's Hamlet and say nothing, nothing.'" We might see the words "writing" in answers (C) and (D) and think they are on topic- after all, Ellen Terry wishes she "were a writer." However, the very point of the sentence is that she is not a writer. So does it make sense for the effect to have to do with writing parts for actors or how to succeed at writing? No! Those answers are completely off-topic. A highly professional and profound production of Hamlet. Key Takeaways The multiple-choice section of AP Lang and Comp has 52-55 questions and is worth 45% of your exam grade. There are eight types of questions you can expect to see on the AP Language and Composition multiple choice exam: Reading comprehension Implication Overall passage and author questions Relationship between parts of the text Interpretation of imagery/figurative language Purpose of part of the text Rhetorical strategy Style and effect The multiple-choice section of the AP Language and Composition exam can be challenging for students who are more used to literary close-reading than rhetorical analysis. However, you can learn to succeed! Here's how to prepare: Read and engage thoughtfully with nonfiction so you can identify essential rhetorical elements quickly and thoroughly. Learn rhetorical terms and strategies and both how to identify them in other works and how to use them in your own writing. Practice for the multiple-choice section! There are a number of resources, both official and unofficial, where you can get practice AP language and composition multiple-choice practice questions. There are some official resources from the College Board and some unofficial free online resources, though you should always be careful to thoroughly investigate unofficial material for quality. Once it's time for test day, here are four strategies to succeed on the multiple-choice section: Interact with the passages as you read them for the first time. Identify the main ideas- the author's purpose, argument, and audience- right after the first time you read the passage. Always go back and re-read the part of the passage in question- don't rely on memory! Watch out for answer choices that are clearly off-topic and eliminate them! Ready like a freshly baked muffin! What's Next? If you need more help with AP Language and Composition, we have a total list of practice tests and a complete guide to the exam. In addition to our guide to AP Lang terms, we also have several more detailed articles about specific literary devices that might prove helpful. We recommend reading through our posts on point of view, tone words, personification, and the literary elements you'll find in every story. For analyzing poetry and poetic prose, we have specific articles on assonance and iambic pentameter, with explanations and examples of each. Taking other APs? See six tips for acing your AP exams, our five-step AP prep plan, and our guide to finding the best AP practice tests. Wondering if you can retake AP exams? We have the answer! Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points or your ACT score by 4 points? We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download it for free now:

T Dinosaur Extinction Event

The K/T Dinosaur Extinction Event About 65 and a half million years ago, at the end of the Cretaceous period, dinosaurs, the largest, most fearsome creatures ever to rule the planet, died off in vast quantities, along with their cousins, the pterosaurs, and marine reptiles. Although this mass extinction didnt happen literally overnight, in evolutionary terms, it may as well have - within a few thousand years of whatever catastrophe caused their demise, the dinosaurs had been wiped off the face of the Earth. The Cretaceous-Tertiary Extinction Event - or K/T Extinction Event, as its known in scientific shorthand - has spawned a variety of less-than-convincing theories. Up until a few decades ago, paleontologists, climatologists, and assorted cranks blamed everything from epidemic disease to lemming-like suicides to intervention by aliens. That all changed, though, when the Cuban-born physicist Luis Alvarez had an inspired hunch. Did a Meteor Impact Cause the Extinction of the Dinosaurs? In 1980, Alvarez - along with his physicist son, Walter- put forth a startling hypothesis about the K/T Extinction Event. Along with other researchers, the Alvarezes had been investigating sediments laid down all over the world around the time of the K/T boundary 65 million years ago (its generally a straightforward matter to match geologic strata - layers of sediment in rock formations, river beds, etc. - with specific epochs in geologic history, especially in areas of the world where these sediments accumulate in roughly linear fashion). These scientists discovered that the sediments laid down at the K/T boundary were unusually rich in the element iridium. In normal conditions, iridium is extremely rare, leading the Alvarezes to conclude that the Earth was struck 65 million years ago by an iridium-rich meteorite or comet. The iridium residue from the impact object, along with millions of tons of debris from the impact crater, would have quickly spread all over the globe; the massive amounts of dust blotted out the sun, and thus killed the vegetation eaten by herbivorous dinosaurs, the disappearance of which caused the starvation of carnivorous dinosaurs. (Presumably, a similar chain of events led to the extinction of ocean-dwelling mosasaurs and giant pterosaurs like Quetzalcoatlus.) Where Is the K/T Impact Crater? Its one thing to propose a massive meteor impact as the cause of the K/T Extinction, but its quite another to adduce the necessary proof for such a bold hypothesis. The next challenge the Alvarezes faced was to identify the responsible astronomical object, as well as its signature impact crater - not as easy a matter as you might think  since the Earths surface is geologically active and tends to erase evidence of even large meteorite impacts over the course of millions of years. Amazingly, a few years after the Alvarezes published their theory, investigators found the buried remains of a huge crater in the region of Chicxulub, on Mexicos Mayan peninsula. Analysis of its sediments demonstrated that this gigantic (over 100 miles in diameter) crater had been created 65 million years ago - and was clearly caused by an astronomical object, either a comet or a meteor, sufficiently large (anywhere from six to nine miles wide) to occasion the extinction of the dinosaurs. In fact, the size of the crater closely matched the rough estimate proposed by the Alvarezes in their original paper! Was the K/T Impact the Only Factor in Dinosaur Extinction? Today, most paleontologists agree that the K/T meteorite (or comet) was the prime cause of the extinction of the dinosaurs - and in 2010, an international panel of experts endorsed this conclusion after re-examining massive amounts of evidence. However, this doesnt mean there couldnt have been aggravating circumstances: for instance, its possible that the impact was roughly concurrent with an extended period of volcanic activity on the Indian subcontinent, which would have further polluted the atmosphere, or that dinosaurs were dwindling in diversity and ripe for extinction (by the end of the Cretaceous period, there was less variety among dinosaurs than at earlier times in the Mesozoic Era). Its also important to remember that the K/T Extinction Event wasnt the only such catastrophe in the history of life on Earth - or even the worst, statistically speaking. For example, the end of the Permian period, 250 million years ago, witnessed the Permian-Triassic Extinction Event, a still-mysterious global catastrophe in which over 70 percent of land-dwelling animals and a whopping 95 percent of marine animals went kaput. Ironically, it was this extinction that cleared the field for the rise of the dinosaurs toward the end of the Triassic period - after which they managed to hold the world stage for a whopping 150 million years, until that unfortunate visit from the Chicxulub comet.

Development of motion picture. Do not plagiarism please instructor Essay

Development of motion picture. Do not plagiarism please instructor checks Thanks - Essay Example The article gives a history of Chaney’s acting career in the age of freak show embodiment in movies, and his apparent liking o playing morbid and unusual characters in the movies. Chaney is depicted as having acquired a cultish following from his movies, especially among the male gender. However, women and children are rare fans of the actor’s works. From the article, I am of the opinion that the author best brings out Chaney’s character and history. Despite some of the criticism portrayed, I feel that Chaney was justified in portraying the grotesque characters in the movies, partly because of the current interest in freak shows and because actors have to be unique to succeed. It is evident that Chaney attracted a lot of interest from the male population because of the unusualness of his movies and frightened away women and children because of the horrors he depicted in the

Nature Writing Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1250 words

Nature Writing - Essay Example The following paper will examine the descriptions of nature in Aldo Leopold’s work as they are deeply moving and spiritually satisfying, but how it is his humility about the inability of language to capture the true depth of the beauty of nature that provides the best reasons for conserving the natural world. The book begins by saying â€Å"There are some who can live without wild things and some who cannot. These essays are the delights and dilemmas of one who cannot† (Leopold 21). Written by Leopold on March 4, 1948, this statement puts in two sentences the nature of his existence within this world and how he was challenged by it. His essays develop a strong argument for conservationism, providing the roots through which the conservation movement was able to take hold. A seminal work on providing context for the concepts that supported the need for conserving the natural world, the descriptions and challenges presented are engaging no matter what level of kinship one feels for nature. There is a passage in his March section which describes the activities of woodcocks in April and May of each year. Leopold missed the ‘dance’ that he describes for the first two years that they lived in the area. After those first two years, however, he describes a ritual of the evening that would begin exactly one minute later each night for those two months. He writes â€Å"It is unfortunate, perhaps, that no matter how intently one studies the hundred little dramas of the woods and meadows, one can never learn all the salient facts about any one of them† (Leopold 41). The use of the concept of data as a way to engage the reader provides human context for the understanding of nature that he creates. When Leopold discusses the woodcocks, he frames their rituals in terms of human understandings. He puts them on a clock that shifts by one minute later every day. He places them in the calendar for performing this ritual through April and May of ea ch year. He creates data that is placed into context in terms that human beings understand. However, the woodcocks likely have no understanding of months or minutes. They follow the cues that nature has provided. It is through modeling that Leopold is able to provide the reader a way in which to relate the natural world to the human world. In his August essay, â€Å"The Green Pasture†, Leopold compares the artist to the work of the river as it carves out color and texture onto the sandbar (233). Unlike the human artist whose work lasts for generations to observe, the river paints its work so that only a moment of it exists and in that moment the human memory is all that will preserve it. He uses the model of the painter as the structure in which he interprets the work of the river. As he uses the metaphor of the painter in order to describe what he has observed about the changing imagery. Even in the beauty of the essay as it defines the way in which the river impacts on its environment, he has only created an illusion about its nature. In his essay â€Å"Marshland Elegy†, Leopold seemed to experience the way in which the ancient nature of the land was connected to the present in a way that was not linear. The past as it is reflected in the lives of the cranes means that the human interpretation of time may not be as accurate as that of nature. The cyclical nature of life and death as it continues to nourish and feed an

Painted Limestone Pair Statue of Ptahkhenwy and his Wife Essay Example for Free

Painted Limestone Pair Statue of Ptahkhenwy and his Wife Essay A serdab is a hidden chamber in an Egyptian tomb from which the deceased are believed to view the rituals of their cult. In 1906, a team led by the Boston Museum of Fine Arts Expeditions explored a tomb in Giza, Egypt and were thrilled to stumble upon a painted limestone statue of a couple in the serdab of the tomb. The finding of the statue from the tomb was the first of its kind, and it was received with much excitement by the trustees of the museum. An inscription at the base of the statue identifies the man as Ptahkhenwy, supervisor of palace trainers and his partner’s name is not legible. The couple is believed to have belonged to the Old Kingdom of Egypt, which flourished from 2465—2323 B. C. This statue of Ptahkhenwy and his wife was sculpted from limestone and was about 70. 14 cm tall. It was painted, and the paint was almost intact at the time of the find. This was quite unlike other Egyptian sculptures, which were often excavated with their colors lost. Though Ptahkhenwy wasn’t of royal descend, the artist who made this private sculpture had tried to add a royal touch to it. This is evident from the pose of Ptahkhenwy’s wife who, standing beside Ptahkhenwy, has an arm embracing her husband. This pose is similar to the sculpture of King Menkaure and his queen. The man poses with his left leg forward, a traditional pose of a male, and the woman has both her feet together. This is not a true portrait. It is evident from the fact that both their facial features are the same. The artist seems to have made them so to concede with their wish of being remembered in this beautiful form in posterity. The artist had retained a traditional touch to the sculpture. Ptahkhenwy is colored in red ochre. This is the traditional color for Egyptian men and it indicates the work that they do outside their homes leaving them sunburned. His wife is colored in yellow ochre. This indicates that she was mostly bound to the insides of her house. The negative space between the couple is painted gray. Both their garments are in white color. The wife wears a V-collared sheath dress that was the traditional costume of the women of those times. To add an aesthetic touch, the artist has made the dress cling to the body of the woman. It is so tight that it reveals every part of her body and, according to the Museum of Fine Arts, even â€Å"walking would have been impossible† in such a costume. However, it was not so in reality. Women wore much looser garments enabling them to carry on their chores. The man wears the customary wrap-around kilt that runs up to his knee. The artist has added bright jewelry to Ptahkhenwy and his wife. This was common of the Egyptians of the time. Both wear broad collars. Bright colors in the collars are indicative of semi-precious stones or glazed earthenware. The lady wears two anklets and a bracelet. The design and color are almost similar to actual jewelry found in other Egyptian tombs. Both wear black wigs—Ptahkhenwy’s has curls cut in rows and his wife’s is parted in the center and reaches her shoulder level.

Framework and Physics of an Autogyro Essay -- Physics Science Helicopt

To fully understand the physics of an autogyro, one must know what it is. An autogyro is an aircraft, similar to a modern helicopter in appearance, but with a few major dissimilarities. It, like a helicopter, uses an overhead rotor as its main source of lift. The rotor on an autogyro, however, is freely rotating, meaning it is not powered by any engine, and therefore applies no rotational force, or torque, on the machine. This nullifies the need for a tail rotor like that of a helicopter's because there is no need to stabilize the fuselage from twisting. Because of the fact that the rotor does not spin on its own to give itself thrust like a helicopter, it makes for the need of another form of forward propulsion. This comes in the form of a propeller, like that on an airplane, to propel the machine forward, which makes air to pass though the overhead rotor, causing it to spin and create lift. The faster the machine goes, the more lift the rotor creates. Autogyros can fly very slow, sink vertically down, take off vertically up if a jump-start is added, and even fly somewhat backwards. Something they cannot do, however, is hover. They can "hover against the wind" if a small breeze is present, but do not have the capabilities of actual hovering. Autogyros are excellent at maneuvering and can land on small platforms and oilrigs. Autogyros are generally small in comparison to helicopters, or any other type of aircraft. Hobbyists, the main producers of autogyros, typically make them in the range of 200-2000 pounds. This is extremely small in comparison to their fixed-winged, and forcefully rotating cousins. Because of this, they can traverse into very tight spots, slowly, and quietly, making them a great candidate for military reco... ...negative aestheticism extends throughout the machine, not remaining just in the front, thereby eliminating anyone to want to fly it. Thrust is the final and perhaps one of the most important forces in the system. Enough thrust allows you to overcome drag and therefore produce a net motion of forward, and therefore climb. The thrust in an autogyro system is different than that of a fixed-wing aircraft in that it is not always wise to give more or full power to correct an emergency situation. Often decreasing your thrust will produce a higher rotor speed. This has to do with the angle that the rotor hits the air. When you decrease thrust, the tail end of the gyro tends to dip down, making the rotor tilt back giving more air to hit the blades, and thereby increasing the rotor speed. In contrast, it would be wise to pull the stick back a bit when increasing thrust.

Linguistics and Children Essay

This assignment will firstly explain the meaning of the following terms, communicative competence and metalinguistic awareness. Observations have shown that children do imitate older peers and adults when speaking as well as signs of creativity from an early age when developing language. Then the second section will evaluate the roles of creativity and imitation in regards to learning spoken English. This assignment will focus on the spoken English of young children. Part 1 Communicative competence – Is a term that refers to the way in which a language user communicates efficiently and successfully depends upon their communicative competence. Linguist Noam Chomsky depicted a variation within the term ‘linguistic’ which he divided into to competence and performance. The term linguistic performance is associated with incorrectly and/or repeated ungrammatical delivered actual utterances of language in use. Linguistic competence refers to the knowledge of the language system which will enable the speaker to distinguish the utterances that are grammatical in the language from those that are not. (Chomsky, 1965 cited in Book3, pg 48) However linguist Hymes believed speakers need to attain distinctive skills in performance such as what is the socially appropriate turn of phrase to accomplish the desired effect as well as knowing when to speak. With regards to children as well as learning the construction and sounds of particular languages they are actually learning the discourse procedures of their communities. The term also incorporates word meaning, grammar and pronunciations well as applying language aptly, verbally, written and non- verbal cues such as body language. (Book3, pg 201) Metalinguistic awareness – Is a term used to define an individual’s ability to reflect on the use of language in with regards to clarifying the transfer of linguistic skills and knowledge across languages. When a language user’s metalinguistic awareness develops they start to create new and refined use of metaphors such as the simile â€Å"life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get† they also begin to realise that statements can have an implied meaning as well as a factual meaning. They may even start to identify sarcasm along with contrariness which connects with an individual’s capability of telling and /or understanding jokes, manipulating language (Kerper, 2009) Part 2 Children can acquire language as a result of imitation however it isn’t the initial method into language acquisition due to children demonstrating creative practice of language. (Book 3, pg 27) Infants produce a variety of sounds during the initial year of their life in addition to experimenting with vocal play. (Book 3, pg 8) The rate of development differs between each child, for example it is rare for a child to skip the babbling stage, which usually occurs at the average age of 11months, and another factor that assists speech development is physiological maturation. (Book 3, pg9) Benedict, 1979 cited in Book 3, pg19 researched development of vocabulary of a small group of children (8) during the course of six months. The findings demonstrated children’s ability to understand and create words between the ages of 10 months and on average 1 year 9 months. By the time the child is 11 months and 15 days they are usually attain a comprehension vocabulary of twenty words. The process of attaining words in production takes longer than it does in comprehension, comprehension can usually occurs 4 months before production. With regards to ‘imitation’ the role of the caregiver (a term used for those individuals who spend the most time interacting with and looking after the child. ) (Book 3, pg 11) much research has been done in this area whereby the emphasis is on a pair in this case it involves the child and their main caregiver, this is also known as a term called a dyad. The findings from this research revealed that the person the child has most direct contact with impart the language surroundings that the child will model. Other linguistic modelling that adults provide is through caregiving schedules, for instances bathing and feeding, these routines provide occasions for conventional interactions concerning language. ‘Peek a boo’ A customary game that is usually played between infant and caregiver and generally in Western cultures. (Book 3, pg14) As a rule the adult attempts to grasp the infant’s interest the concealing their eyes behind a hand or an object after which a type of discourse occurs, for example the adult might say ‘Are you ready? ‘Then the infant’s vocalisations or actions are indicated as a response. This sequence of question –and – reply is continued until the apprehension develops at this point the adult takes their hand away or removes the object and says ‘Boo! ’ (Book 3, pg 15) Trevarthen and Aitken , 2001 cited in Book 3, pg 15 believed this kind of game could be termed ‘protoconversations’, because it is similar to a conversation. It requires turn – taking, each person’s turn relies on the previous is input of the partner, therefore it is contingent, the partners understand the sequence disclose the same intention. Therefore this kind of interaction initiates ceremonial features of conversations before young children are able to speak but prompt passage to language. A universal observation made regarding the type of dialogue directed to children by adults is that the dialogue differs to that addressed to other adults. Consequently caregivers amend their dialogue for instance delivery slowed down, intonation is amplified and an elevated pitch may be used. Older children also adapt their dialogue for younger children comparable to adults, this is also evident that older children are emulating adults and implementing this technique to young children. (Book 3, pg15) this dialogue style is referred to as child directed speech (CDS). Clifton Pye, 1986 cited in Book 3, pg 16 observed a community in Central America called Quiche, they spoken one of the native Mayan languages. The results showed a difference in the way in which Quiche caregivers and Western caregivers adapt their dialogue for young children. Regardless of this cultural difference in caregiver – child interaction, the children in the Quiche community were able to speak fluently in their native language. Shirley Brice Heath’s research 1983 cited in Book 3, pg 16 of black working-class English speaking community discovered that adults in this community didn’t usually use ‘baby talk’ when interacting with young children. The ways in which children’s grammar develop could also be due to imitation as well. Descriptive grammar is a term referring to how children organise and structure speech, it doesn’t link to the correct ‘English’ people should use. Investigations into children’s grammar showed that a constant procedure is involved in the attainment of grammar. Crystal, 1995, cited in Book 3, pg 25 acknowledged seven stages ranging from formative years to adolescent. In the early stages of grammatical development children apply brief utterances of two to three words without any grammatical markers; children are usually aged between 18 months to 2 years. In the next stage of usually 3 years children start to add markers to words such as tense ( I played), plural (one cat, two cats). The second stage within Crystal’s paradigm is a term called telegraphic speech during this stage, children do not use grammatical markers instead they use verbs, temporal adverbs, adjectives and nouns. The crucial information is apparent because the details and trimmings are removed; this telegraphic quality is stated in children’s imitation of adult’s speech. Also during the second stage it has been noted that children’s speech will likely to be: a more water; baby drink; allgone sticky. However in this instance it is unlikely that children will have heard adults make these types of utterances which means they can be depicted as unique utterances, and since the meaning will be comprehensible, this utterance can also be viewed as a success. This all goes to illustrate that even at the first stages of language development children are showcasing their creativity. Most adults especially parents have heard their child/ran emulate them using adult expression and even intonation. With regards to creativity and language development, numerous researches from the theories L. S. Vygotsky (1967) and Jean Piaget (1962) cited in Gillen, 2009 has found that there is a substantial link between play and language learning. Play encourages children’s imaginative thought process through playing with objects that will then eventually lead to a better understanding of their environment. As the child’s ability to create more meaningful representations develop so does the more complex their play becomes. Bloom, 1993, p.216 cited in Gillen, 2009, p 56. Observed that a ‘spurt’ in first words was usually due to development in play behaviours. From observations children unconsciously obtain rules about real-life behaviour, and implement what they have observed into their play with a mixture of their own imagination. When children are involved in pretence games with other children it is called sociodramatic play, within this type of play it is suggested that children practice different registers of talk that they observe to fit in with that role. To conclude it seems as though the interactions typically viewed of caregivers and infants are not essential and general characteristic initial language experience. There was a variance in comprehension and creation of vocabulary. Evidence derived from research of language acquisition is usually carried out from a limited collection of cultural and social backgrounds so the findings of primitive grammatical development in English are from language users of the normal criterion of the language. The section regarding play and language development suggests that creativity and imitation interlock, it appears that both coincide together it appears both weigh evenly in terms of forming spoken English. References Gillen, J. , (2009) Block C, Learning English, Unit 17 The relationship between play and language learning, The Open University Kerper, M,. J. ‘Metalinguistic awareness as defined through research’ San Diego State University 2009-08-10 Mayor, B. , Mercer, N. and Swann, J. (eds) Learning English, London, Routledge/The Open University.

Bite Me: A Love Story Chapter 1

The third book in the Love Story series, 2010 1. Hello Kitty BEING THE JOURNAL OF ABIGAIL VON NORMAL, Emergency Backup Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Night The City of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge, shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public. Which isn't, like, as bad as it sounds, because the general public kind of sucks ass. Still, I think that this battle of dark powers; the maintenance of my steamy, forbidden romance; the torturous break-in of a new pair of red vinyl, thigh-high Skankenstein; platform boots; as well as the daily application of complex eye makeup and whatnot, totally justify my flunking Biology 102. (Introduction to Mutilation of Preserved Marmot Cadavers, with Mr. Snavely, who totally has his way with the marmots when no one is around, I have it on good authority.) But try to tell that to the mother unit, who deserves this despair and disappointment for cursing me with her tainted and small-boobed DNA. Allow me to catch you up, s'il vous plaà ®t. Pay attention, bitches, there will be a test. Three lifetimes ago, or maybe it was like last semester, because like the song says, â€Å"time is like a river of slippery excretions when you're in love†-anyway-during winter break, Jared and I were in Walgreens looking for hypoallergenic eye makeup when we encountered the beautiful, redheaded Countess Jody and her consort of blood, my Dark Lord, the vampyre Flood, who was totally disguised in jeans and flannel as a loser. And I was all, â€Å"Nosferatu.† Whispered to Jared like a night wind through dead trees. And Jared was all, â€Å"No way, you sad, deluded little slut.† And I was all, â€Å"Shut your fetid penis port, you spunk-breathed poseur.† Which he took as a compliment, so that's how I meant it, because while Jared is deeply gay, he's never really gayed anyone up, except maybe his pet rat, Lucifer. Strictly speaking, I think Jared would be considered a rodentsexual, if not for the difficult geometry of the relationship. (See, size does matter!) Note to self: I should totally set Jared up with Mr. Snavely and they can talk about squirrel-shagging and whatnot and maybe I won't have to repeat Bio 102. Anyway, Jared is a fitting support player in the tragedy that is my life, as he dresses dismal chic and excels at brooding, self-loathing, and allergies to beauty products. I've tried to talk him into going pro. ‘Kayso, the vampyre Flood had me meet him at a club, where I offered up myself to his dark desires, which he totally rejected because of his eternal love of the Countess. So he bought me a cappuccino instead and appointed me to be their official minion. It is the duty of the minion to rent apartments, do laundry, and bring the masters a sack with a tasty kid in it, although I never did that last part because the masters don't like kids. ‘Kayso, the vampyre Flood gave me money and I rented a trs cool loft in the SOMA (which is widely accepted to be the best ‘hood for vampyres because there's mostly new buildings and no one would suspect ancient creatures of purest evil to hang out there). But it turns out, it was like half a block from the trs cool loft in the SOMA that they already lived in. ‘Kayso, when I take the key to them, hoping they will bestow the dark gift of immortality upon me, this limo full of wasted college-age guys and a painted blue ho with ginormous fake boobs pulls up. And they're all, â€Å"Where is Flood? We need to talk to Flood. And let us in,† and other demanding shit. And I'm all, â€Å"No way, step off Smurfett. There's no one named Flood here.† I know! I was all, Oh-my-fucking-zombie-jebus-on-a-pogo-stick! She was blue! And I'm not racist, so shut up. She clearly had self-esteem issues that she compensated for with giant fake boobs, slutty blue body-paint, and doing a carload full of stoners for money. I'm not judging her by the color of her skin. Everyone copes. When I got braces I went through a Hello Kitty phase that lasted well into my fifteens, and Jared maintains that I am still perky at heart, which is not true. I am simply complex. But more about the blue hooker later, because right then the Asian guy looks at his watch and says, â€Å"Too late, it's sunset.† And they drove off. Which is when I opened the door into the stairwell to the loft and was confronted by Chet, the huge shaved vampyre cat. (Except, at the time, I didn't know his name, and he was wearing a red sweater, so I didn't know he was shaved, and he wasn't a vampyre yet. But huge.) So I'm all, â€Å"Hey, kitty, go away.† And he did, leaving only William, the huge shaved cat homeless guy, lying on the steps. I thought he was dead, because of the smell, but it turns out he was only passed out from alcohol and partially drained of blood and stuff. But I'm pretty sure he's dead now because, later, Foo and I found his stank-ass clothes on the steps of the loft, full of the gray dust that people turn to when a vampyre drains them. So upstairs I'm all, â€Å"There's a dead guy and a huge kitty in a sweater on your steps.† And the Countess and Flood are all, â€Å"Whatever.† And I'm all, â€Å"And there was a limo full of stoners here who were totally hunting you.† And they were all, â€Å"Whoa.† And they seemed more freaked out than you'd think, for ancient creatures of dark forbidden romance and whatnot. And it turns out they weren't-I mean, aren't. I mean, sure, their love is eternal, and they are creatures of unspeakable evil and stuff, but they are not ancient at all. It turns out that the vampyre Flood is only like nineteen, and he's only known the Countess for like two months. And she's only like twenty-six, which, while a little crusty, is not that ancient. And despite her advanced age, the Countess is beautiful, with long, totally natch red hair and milky skin, green eyes like emerald fire, and a smoking body that could turn a girl totally lesbo if she wasn't already a slave to the mad, man-ninja sex-fu of the delicious Foo Dog. (Foo keeps insisting that he can't be a ninja because he's Chinese and ninjas are Japanese, but he's just being stubborn and goes all Angry, Angry Asian on me whenever I bring it up.) ‘Kayso, in the master's loft I see these two bronze statues, one of this crusty businessman-looking guy, and the other looks like the Countess, except it's totally naked, or in a leotard, and bronze. And I'm all, â€Å"Exhibitionist, much, Countess? Did it come with a pole?† And she's all, â€Å"Help Tommy move furniture, Wednesday.† Like that makes any sense at all. (Turns out that Wednesday is a Gothish character from some crusty movie.) ‘Kayso, later, by virtue of my extensive research and sneaking around and whatnot, I find out that the statues aren't statues at all. That the Countess used to be inside the statue of her, and that inside the crusty businessman statue is the real ancient creature of unspeakable evil, the nosferatu that turned the Countess. And the vampyre Flood, who wasn't a vampyre at all at the time, had bronzed the two of them when they were sleeping the deep sleep of the daytime dead, which is like the deepest sleep you can get. (You should know right now, that there's no yawning, gentle drift into sleepytime for vampyres. When the sun breaks the horizon, they drop rag-doll dead on the spot, and you can pose them, paint them, put their hands on their junk and post the pics on the Web, and they won't know a thing until sundown when they come on like a light and they're wondering why their naughty bits are green and their inbox is full of propositions from elfin_love.com.) I know. Whoa! It turns out that Flood, who was known as Tommy, was chosen by the Countess as her day-minion, blood lunch, and love monkey, because he worked nights at the Safeway. Then, the old vampyre, who had turned the Countess only like a week before, started fucking with them-saying he was going to kill Tommy and generally harsh Jody's reality. ‘Kayso, Flood and his stoner Safeway night crew (called the Animals) hunted down the alpha vampyre, who was sleeping in a big yacht in the Bay, and they stole like jillions in art from the yacht and blew it up with the vampyre in it, which seriously put habaneras in his ‘tude lube, but when he came out of the water, they fucked him up a good long time with spear guns and whatnot. I know! Oh-my-fucking-god-ponies-in-the-barbecue! I know! It just goes to show you, like Lord Byron says in the poem: â€Å"Given enough weed and explosives, even a creature of most sophisticated and ancient dark power can be undone by a few stoners.† I'm paraphrasing. It may have been Shelley. ‘Kayso, the Countess saves the old vampyre from being toasted, but she promises the cops (there were these two cops) to take him away and never come back to the City, but when they go to sleep, Flood, who couldn't bear to lose Jody, took them downstairs to the biker-sculptors and had them bronzed. But when he was trying to explain to the Countess about why he did it, he drilled holes in the bronze by her ears, and she turned into mist, streamed into the room, and turned him into a vampyre. Which totally surprised him, because he didn't even know she knew how to do either of those things. (Misting and turning, I mean.) So then they're like, both vampyres, eternal in their love, but somewhat lame in their night skills. Because Jody had been feeding off of Tommy, she hadn't thought through what they would eat after Tommy turned vampyre. So, first they went to this homeless guy we'll call William the Huge Cat Guy (because that's what people call him) because he used to sit on Market Street with Chet and a sign that said, I AM POOR AND MY CAT IS HUGE. And they ended up renting the huge cat, Chet, to be their shared blood lunch. But it turned out that a large part of Chet's kitty hugeness was fur, so in order to facilitate the biting process, they shaved him. I'm just glad that I wasn't their minion yet, because I think we all know who would have ended up shaving the kitty. But no! It didn't work. I'm not sure why. But William got totally, date-rape-level hammered on the liquor he bought with the huge cat rent money, and they ended up feeding on him. Which is where I, the new princess-elect of darkness, was brought into the fold. (Into the â€Å"fold† means, like, the gang, as in gang of sheep, not fold like in what you do to T-shirts if you're a casual cotton slave at Old Navy.) It was I, who turned Tommy onto the needle exchange program, where he was able to use his pale thinness to convince them he was a junkie and get syringes so they could take William's blood and put it in the fridge for the Countess to have in her coffee. Turns out that the only way the vampyre can tolerate real food or drink is if it has a little human blood in it. (The Countess likes blood on her fries, which is at once trs cool and deeply fucked-up.) So, as soon as the Countess and Flood figured out the deal with blood and food, William the Huge Cat Guy wandered off and the Countess had to go find him, since she has more experience at hunting the night, while Flood and I moved stuff from one loft to the other. But I had to get lice shampoo for my useless little sister, Ronnie, who was plagued by vermin, and Flood sent me home early to spare me the wrath of the mother unit because he didn't want his minion on restriction. (So noble. I think that's when I fell in love with him.) Then he took the bronzed old vampyre down to the water to dump him in the Bay before the Countess got back. It was clear to me that Tommy had jealousy issues with the old vampyre, and wanted to get rid of him. Except he ran out of dark before he got to the Bay and had to leave the old vampyre sitting by the Ferry Building on the Embarcadero and run from the sun for his life. At the last minute, the Animals drive by in their limo with their stupid blue ho an d scoop the vampyre Flood off the street just before he was incinerated by the sun. I know. WTF? (FYI, when I type WTF, you are supposed to read it What the Fuck? Same with OMG, and OMFG, which are Oh My God and Oh My Fucking God. Only a completely lame Disney Channel nimnode pronounces the letters. Even BMLWA, or Bite My Lily White Ass should only be spoken as letters if you are hanging out with nuns or other people who are embarrassed about being told to bite asses.) ‘Kayso, the Animals go back to work at the Safeway, but not before they tie Flood to a bed frame, where the blue hooker tortured him to get him to turn her into a vampyre, because now she had like all the money that the Animals had gotten for the old vampyre's art, which was like six hundred thousand dollars, and she wanted to take her time spending it, so she wanted to be immortal. But Flood was like a complete vamp noob. He'd never even killed anyone and turned them to dust or anything, so he didn't know how to change someone. The Countess didn't tell him that the chosen had to drink the vampyre's blood to receive the dark gift. So the blue ho tortures the shit out of him. I know, what a bitch. Meanwhile, the Countess found the huge cat guy, and I found the lice shampoo, but we don't know where Tommy is. But the Countess was burned from going out on some hot water pipes, so she fed on me, right there in the loft, and I was all, â€Å"Oh shit, I'm going to get the dark gift and I'm, like, wearing my lime-green Chuck Taylors, which are totally not the kicks for becoming a creature of unspeakable power in.† But no, the Countess just partook of my sanguine nectar so she could heal. That's probably where I fell in love with her. Anyway, she goes asking around about Tommy, and this completely crazy homeless guy who thinks he is the Emperor of San Francisco (you see him and his two dogs in the north end of the City all the time) says that one of the Animals was asking around about Flood. So I'm all, â€Å"Uh-oh.† And the Countess is all, â€Å"Yep.† Next thing you know, we are at the Marina Safeway and the Countess-wearing her black jeans and red leather jacket, but no lipstick-underhands a steel reinforced trash can like as big as a lesbian gym teacher through the big front window, and she just walks right through the falling glass, badass as shit, into the store and starts kicking stoner ass. It was glorious. But she didn't kill anyone, which turned out to be a mistake, as was, in my humble opinion, not wearing any lipstick. For while it was a heroic ass-kicking as has ever been delivered in real life, it would have been that much cooler if she had some black lipstick on, or maybe something in a dark maroon. But they told her that Tommy was tied up at Lash's, the black guy's, apartment. And their shit was all busted up, and I was like, â€Å"You bitches have been powned!† And the Countess was like, â€Å"That's cute. Let's go get Tommy.† She can be kind of a bitch sometimes. Anyway, we go to the apartment where Tommy is being held, but when we get there, he's still tied to the bed frame, but stood up against a wall, all naked and covered in blood, even his junk. And the blue ho is dead on the floor. And I'm all, â€Å"Uh-oh.† And the Countess is all, â€Å"Yep.† And she says something about how the blue ho must have broken her neck or something, because if Tommy had drained her, she would have turned to dust and there would have been no body. Anyway, the cab ride back to the loft was trs awkward, you know, with Flood naked and covered with blood and the two of them all, â€Å"Oh I love you† and, â€Å"Oh I love you, too.† And I was being kind of a mopey little emo queen because I was jealous of both of them because they had their dark and eternal love for each other and I had like my lime-green Chucks and Jared the gay-bait rat-shagger. So that was good. The rescue and whatnot. Because we found the old vampyre art money that the Animals had paid to the blue ho, which was like a half a million dollars. But then we found out that the blue ho was not dead, but somehow had accidentally drunk some of Tommy's blood when she kissed him during his torture and now she was nosferatu. And she turned all the Animals. Which, you know, was bad. And not in the good way. And the old vampyre had somehow escaped his bronze shell, and he was coming after Tommy and Jody, and even me? He even shook the living shit out of William the Huge Cat Guy while Jared and I watched from an alley across the street. I know! We were all, â€Å"Whoa?† So it's like, Christmas night, and Jared and I are watching the midnight show of The Nightmare Before Christmas at the Metreon. And we're all traumatized and whatnot from watching the vampyre pound the huge cat guy, and the Countess calls us. And she and my Dark Lord Flood meet us for coffee at this Chinese diner, which is like the only thing open because the Chinese totally blow off Christmas because there are no dragons or firecrackers in the story. Note to self: Write narrative poem exploring Christmas if the three wise men had given baby Jesus firecrackers, a dragon, and mu-shu pork instead of that other crap. So, after all night drinking coffee laced with Jared's blood and getting the story on the old vampyre from the Countess and Flood, we go back to the loft and there, in the stairway, is the old vampyre, naked. And he's all, â€Å"I had to do some laundry. That guy peed on my tracksuit.† (He was wearing a total gangsta yellow tracksuit when we saw him shaking the huge cat guy.) So we like ran, and we had to hide my masters in some rafters under the Bay Bridge when they went out at dawn. No yawning or anything-they just became dead. Well, undead. So we wrapped them in trash bags and duct tape and moved them to Jared's basement lair in Noe Valley. (His basement lair is sacrosanct-his father and stepmother are afraid that they might walk in on him wanking to gay porn-so it was safe for the masters.) Meanwhile, I went back to the loft to feed Chet the huge shaved cat and decapitate the old vampyre with Jared's dagger so I could get extra-credit points with the masters, but it turned out that I had not calculated sundown quite right. Since when does the sun go down at like five o'clock? That's just fucking juvenile. Anyway, when I'm on the steps I hear the old vampyre moving around upstairs. And I'm all, â€Å"Awkward.† Then I hear a car pull up and I run out, right into the arms of this blond ho, who it turns out is the blue ho, who is now nosferatu, along with three of her vampyre minions who used to be the Animals. I know, â€Å"Uh-oh.† So she grabs me and is just about to tear my throat out, when the old vampyre grabs her by the neck and puts her face print in the hood of a Mercedes. He's all, â€Å"You're breaking the rules, ho. You can't just go turning people willy-nilly.† So I was doing a minor booty-dance of ownage at the blond ho, when they all turned on me. So I pull out Jared's dagger, but just the same I know they are going to have a huge group suck on my pale frame, when this totally fly, race-pimped Honda comes tearing out of the alley, and everything goes white light around the car. And my manga-haired love monkey, Foo, is totally in hero shades, and he's all, â€Å"Get in.† ‘Kayso, he swept me away in his magic nerd-chariot, which he had rigged with ultraviolet floodlights that totally toasted the vamps with simulated sunlight. I know! I'd have done him right there in the car if I was not trying to maintain my detached aura of aristocratic chill. So instead I kissed him within an inch of his life, then slapped him so he didn't think I was his personal slut, which I totally was. Would be. It turns out that Steve, which is Foo Dog's day-slave name, had totally been staking out the Countess Jody's apartment for like a month, since he figured out that she was a vampyre when some blood from one of the old vamp's victims turned up in his hemo-lab at Berkeley. Foo is like some kind of biotech ber-genius, in addition to having mad ninja-driving skills. Then Foo dropped me off at Tulley's on Market, where I met Jared and Jody, who sneaked by Jared's parents by pretending to be lovers, which is disgusting in so many ways I kind of gagged a little when I typed it. (Jared is my emergency backup BFF, but he is a pervy little rat-shagger, as the Countess affectionately refers to him.) So the Countess is all, â€Å"I'm going back to the loft to get the money.† And I'm all, â€Å"No, the old vampyre.† And she is all, â€Å"He is not the boss of me.† (Or something like that. I'm paraphrasing.) And I'm all, â€Å"Whatever, make sure you feed Chet.† So we go back to Jared's, and when we get there, the vampyre Flood is all fucked up from trying to climb face-down a building in the Castro after a delicious drag queen, like Dracula does in the book (only in the book it's not in the Castro and Dracula isn't after a drag queen). Note to self: When I am finally made nosferatu, do not try to climb face-down a wall. So then my sweet love ninja Foo shows up. And he's all, â€Å"I couldn't leave you out here, unprotected.† And secretly I was all, â€Å"You rock my stripy socks, Foo,† but publically I just kissed him and tastefully dry humped his leg a little. So we all got in his fly Honda and went back to the loft. When we got there, the second-floor windows were open, and Flood could hear that the old vampyre was up there with Jody. And Foo was all, â€Å"Let me go.† And out of the hatchback, he pulls this long duster that's covered with little glass warts. And Foo is all, â€Å"UV LEDs. Like sunlight.† The street-level fire door was locked, so Flood was all, â€Å"I'll go.† But Foo was all, â€Å"No, it will burn you.† But they covered Flood all over, gloves, hat, and a gas-mask that Foo keeps around in case of emergency biology and whatnot, then he put on the duster. Foo gave him a rubber tarp and a baseball bat, and Flood starts working the street like a half-pipe, running up a building on one side, then up the other, until he goes feetfirst through the upstairs window. Personally, I think the Countess could have just jumped up there, but she's been a vampyre longer than Flood and has better skills. ‘Kayso, there's this blinding white light from the windows, and next thing we know, the old vampyre comes crashing through the window like a flaming comet and hits the street right by us. And he gets up all blackened and snarly and whatnot, and Foo holds up his UV floodlight and he's all, â€Å"Step off, vampyre scum.† And the old vampyre ran off. Then Flood comes out the door carrying the Countess, who is looking way more dead than usual, and we took them to a motel to hide them until we could figure out what to do. Foo stole some donor blood from the lab at his college and gave it to Flood and the Countess so they could heal. And Foo's all, â€Å"You know, I've been working on the blood I found on the victims, and I think I can reverse the process. I can turn you human again.† Which is totally why he had been stalking the Countess when I met him. So Tommy and Jody were all, â€Å"We'll think about it.† ‘Kayso, Flood is holding Jody on the bed, and they're talking softly, but I can hear them, because I'm just by the door and the room's not that big. And it is clear that their love is eternal and will last for eons, but Flood doesn't like being a vampyre because the hours suck and whatnot, and Jody likes being a vampyre because of the power she feels after feeling like a little wuss-girl for many years, and they more or less say that they are going to split up just as the sun rises and they go out. And I was all, â€Å"Oh, hell no.† So I had them bronzed. I'm looking at them now. We posed them like Rodin's The Kiss and they shall be together unto the end of time, or at least until we figure out how to let them out and not have them tear out our throats and whatnot. Foo says it's cruel, but the Countess told me that they could go to mist, and when they are mist time passes like a dream and it's all good. But Foo did figure out his serum thingy. We lured the Animals to our love nest and while I was wearing the fly leather jacket that Foo made me, complete with the UV LED warts, which is very cool and cyber, I drugged them and Foo changed them back to human. And the crazy old Emperor guy said he saw three young vampyres take the old vampyre and the formerly blue ho away on a ginormous yacht, so we don't have to worry about them anymore. Foo wants to cut Flood and Jody out of the bronze statue during the day, while they are sleeping, and turn them back to human. But the Countess doesn't want that. So I think we should just wait. We have this trs cool apartment, and all of the money, and Foo almost has his master's in bio-nerdism or whatever, and I only have to go home like twice a week so the mother unit still thinks I am living there. (The key was to condition her from age twelve that sleepovers are normal. Lily, my former sleepover BFF, calls it slowly boiling the frog, which I don't know what it means, but it sounds darkly mysterious.) So, we are secure in our love nest and as soon as Foo gets home I am going to reward him with the slow booty dance of forbidden love. But something is screeching outside. BRB. Fucksocks! It's Chet the huge shaved vampyre cat, down on the street. He looks bigger, and I think he ate a meter maid. Her little cart is running and there's an empty uniform on the curb. Bad kitty! GTG L8erz.